The steps of this process allow us to see past our emotions into the root of the situation, our involvement in it, and our options for moving forward.
Identify Values and Priorities
First, we need to identify our original values and priorities for matching up with the relationship originally. Then, we need to identify our values and priorities within the relationship in the present moment. Does our original reason for being there match up with why we are there now? We need to evaluate and update our reason for being in that relationship.
Uncover the Trigger
Second, we need to uncover why the actions of the other person are affecting us so much. We need to dig deep and identify the root of our uncomfort. The other person’s actions could be triggering an unmet expectation or painful memory. What is asking to be healed in ourselves through this experience?
Evaluate Their Actions
Third, we need to evaluate the other person’s actions. Are they treating your poorly? Is this affecting your confidence and ability to grow? How does this affect the steps you would like to take to move forward in your life? From these questions, you can see if the situation is helping or hindering your growth.
After completing these steps, we should have a pretty good idea of the big picture of the situation. At this time we ask, “What is the next best option for growth”. This will help us to untangle emotionally so we can make a clear decision about our next steps.
Make a Move
We are not victims of our circumstance but victims to our perspective of the situation. Regain your power! This process helps us mindfully inspect the aspects affecting the relationship. Empowered with our own information, we can then make the changes necessary to come into alignment with a vision of our next best steps.
Sedona Journal of Emergence